Hello there everybody, my name is RokasLeo. In the previous video called SELF HELP GUYS – “What does it actually indicate to be a male”, I have actually talked how our culture has pressed guys into an idea that a guy has to contribute of a male, rather than to be himself. Exactly how a male has to have savage qualities such as lack of feeling, or make every effort to always appear solid/ by doing this winding up attempting to live up to a difficult requirement – eventually deeply suffering because of it. As a continuation of this topic, in this video clip I’ll share some life hacks just how to manage various daily scenarios/ where we feel pressured to act in “manly” manner ins which are not healthy and balanced for us/ and also exactly how to respond to these situations when others try pressure us to “comply with the herd”. These ideas really apply to both males and females, because both genders struggle with others intending to box us in by telling us how we “Need to” act/ yet because in this video I am dealing with men mostly, I’ll make use of examples from numerous men’s associated situations.Also, if you intend to see
the previous episode first, click the”i”button on the best edge right here. Last but not least, prior to I start I wished to say thank you again to Anna Akana, a remarkable Self Help YouTube creator, who inspired me to do this video collection. And also now, without more goodbye, allow us move on to the subject. Did anybody ever inform you: “You toss the round like a lady?”/ or “you run like a lady?”. Has anyone ever teased you or attempted to disrespect you by saying you were not “manly enough”? To begin with – what’s such a huge deal in doing something like a girl? Women are terrific! Yet obviously, I comprehend what the disrespect suggests as well as attempts to do.It indicates that there is a particular “manly” method to do points. And also if you do not do it in the expected means – culture desires you to believe that there is something wrong with you. Thus being dishonored in comparison to a woman, we start to end up being overly conscious on just how we act as well as try to powerfully act “as a male must”. Now I am not claiming that guys must purposefully act like ladies, however I intend to doubt whether a guy has to act in any specific, pre-ordered way/ like quote on quote – “various other guys do”. Is it really so bad to act in different ways than others to begin with? Obviously that pressure from others to act in a certain means keeps, also if we don’t like it/ and it can be progressively hard to act the way you naturally are drawn to act, due to that high and also routine pressure. Yet there is a simple life hack that can extremely assist you in these circumstances. This hack, I have actually efficiently made use of numerous times in different circumstance and also it is all based upon a couple of straightforward top qualities: curiosity and favorable questioning.In order to clarify just how this life hack functions, let’s come back to the previous instance of someone informing you “you toss the round like a woman “. Typically we come to be humiliated, dismayed, and even upset when someone tells us that. But primarily it occurs since component of us believes that it holds true/ which we Should act differently. Yet to avoid this unneeded and also unjust sensation/ as soon as this emotion of embarassment shows up, you make yourself quit and redirect your power towards a different feeling.You turn it into interest. Then, with all genuineness you rely on the individual that said that and also ask:”Can you clarify to me why that is a problem?”. In many cases, you will certainly be amazed with the look on that individual’s face. He will suddenly come to be confused, due to the fact that originally he didn’t understand himself why that is a problem/ as well as you bring your attention to it. You see, a lot of our activities are acquired and also replicated from others/ and also most of them we do not question/ acting them out for various social factors/ such as attempting to develop a leading placement in a male globe/ trying to be an”Alpha dog “by doing what various other”Alpha pets”we’ve seen do from generation to generation/ without truly recognizing why and just how we do it. Yet whenever you switch on curiosity, not only you question that inside/ by doing this making area for question to occur before ending up being hurt/ yet you also perplex the various other person as well as make him think.Now I pointed out that this will be enough in many cases/ yet some individuals will certainly persist as well as remain to urge that there is a concern. That is not a problem, as long as we remain to be seriously curious.
I’ll offer you an instance:”You toss the sphere like a girl” “Really? Why is that an issue?””Well, due to the fact that … Since women are weak! And that makes you a sissy” “Hm … Are you Certain girls are weak? And what does a sissy essentially suggest? Could you specify it for me? “Whatever they say later, one of the best ways I found to end such a conversation is by saying something along the lines of: “Your arguments don’t seem to me very strong … I’ll consider it, but until I’ll get a clear, well defined argument, I can’t take this critique seriously. “END OF CONVERSATION.Do you see where I am heading? And trust me, it Really Works! As mentioned before/ not only it confuses the other person, but you also start to change your perspective on these matters too. And it applies not only to
aggressive attacks. If you start crying during a movie and someone makes fun of you, you turn on your curiosity and ask:”Why is that a problem? Can you prove to me in a scientific way that it’s bad for a man to cry? “. Or if you dress in a way which brings others to say you are not wearing “manly clothes “, it’s the same thing!”Why is it inappropriate for a man to dress this way? Does it somehow hurt others?”. Now, one last advice I have to say before I let you practice this life hack on your own/ is that you do have to be really SINCERE when using this hack.Otherwise it will not work internally by changing your own perspective/ and will leave space to doubt your own questions. Without sincerely it may also provoke others to consider that you are purely being an”ass “/ which is not what we
really want. But as long as you allow yourself to positively question/ this questioning can actually be healthy not only to you but also to the other person. There are many other life hacks for men we could talk about, yet this one is really effective and simple at the same time. If you want more life hacks for men and life in general/ make sure you subscribe to this channel. Until the next video, I will leave you to try this life hack for men and not only/ and I’ll see you next time in a better world that we’ve already created together:-RRB-